How to Love Yourself: 11 Ways to Start Loving Yourself Again

Amber Murphy
Amber Murphy

In a society the profits from your self-doubt, liking yourself is a rebellious act. Loving yourself is anything but naive. If you don’t become your best friend, who else will?

In our everyday lives, it’s a completely mundane thing to struggle with self-esteem and the act of loving yourself. There are so many surrounding factors and aspects that can make us completely doubt our own self-worth and there’s no concrete answer as to how precisely to love yourself. However, there are some contributing things you can do in practicing the art of self-love.

1. Let go of all your regrets and past mistakes

In order to truly love yourself, you’re going to have to let go of all the what ifs that consume your mind. It’s not a healthy habit to dwell on the past since no matter how much you dwell on it or think about it, nothing’s going to change. The only thing you have control over is the present and what decisions you make today. Dwelling on the past is just going to lead you with negative thoughts which focuses on your faults and flaws, rather than on the aspects of yourself that are good. In loving yourself, it’s significant to avoid negativity as much as you possibly can. When you have negativity in your life, the tendency is to focus on that and it’s going to make you love yourself less.

Do the things that make you happy and start loving yourself again

2. Do things that make you happy

Spending time doing your passion is one of the fastest ways to love yourself, since your passion is what makes you feel good about yourself. Thus, when you’re feeling good, you have more room to love yourself. Whether that’s going out for a movie or playing the guitar, doing your hobbies or the things you love will make you generally a happier and more positive version of yourself. Not to mention, when you spend time on your interests, it makes you proud of the fact that you allocated time for your hobbies when it’s so easy to get caught up in our daily lives.

3. Embrace contentment

In the same sense of not dwelling on your regrets in the past, it’s also important not to dwell on the things you wish you could change in your present. Possibly you’re thinking that you haven’t reached the career path you aspired by this season in your life, or you haven’t become the version of yourself you expected yourself to be. A little pressure is good, however, these kinds of thinking puts too much pressure on yourself in something you can’t change immediately. Loving yourself comes with embracing who you are in this season of you are, without putting unnecessary pressure on yourself. The more you stress yourself out that you’re not where you intend to be, you’re going to overthink everything in your life which again, would lead to negativity.

Surround yourself with people who love you

4. Surround yourself with positive people

The people that you choose to surround yourself with are very important in loving yourself. Once you make the change of surrounding yourself with people who give off positive vibes, people who encourage you and people who are dreamers, they will rub off on you until soon enough, you’ll end up loving yourself even more. In reality, loving yourself comes off from just feeling good about yourself and being confident in your capabilities as a person. This is the reason as to why the key to self-love is usually just positivity and acceptance of who you are as a person.

5. Set boundaries

One of the reasons as to why our lose our self-love is that we forget to set certain boundaries for ourselves and allow people to walk all over us. This is one of the most important things you can integrate in loving yourself. It’s okay to say no if your feelings say otherwise or if it’s draining all the energy out of you. It’s okay to put yourself first, once in a while. You’re not being selfish, you’re just taking good care of yourself. After all, if you don’t love yourself and take care of yourself first, how can you do the same for others?

Your relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship in your life.

Travel to find your self love

6. Travel at least once a year

This is one of the perfect ways to get out of your comfort zone and check something on your bucket list. Whether it’s traveling alone or with friends, traveling always makes you feel good about yourself. Not only do you get a change of scenery but you also get out of your own head. It’s easy to get consumed with our own internal thoughts and problems, and traveling is the perfect escape. With this, it makes you forget momentarily all the things you were worried about and thus, you’d love yourself even more.

7. Form healthy habits

One of the greatest ways to condition our minds (and our lives) towards a positive angle is with our day to day habits. Your habits have so much power behind the entirety of your mindset and your actions. If we have the wrong habits, these can lessen our self-esteem and then lead to feelings of constant doubt and second-guessing our every action. It’s also in our habits where we can train our minds to have a stronger capacity. For instance, choosing to wake up early and work out in the morning is an example of a good and healthy habit. Not only does this promote dedication and motivation, but doing this makes you productive and ends up making you love yourself after.

Start journaling

8. Start a journal

Positive words of affirmation is one of the effective things you can do as a self-love activity. Basically, you start a journal and you can write whatever you want in it that leans towards appreciate all the aspects about yourself. You could write about all the things you’re grateful for for that day, or you could also write a personal letter to yourself that pertains to anything that you’re proud of yourself for accomplishing. This is an effective activity since it promotes you to actively analyze the positive aspects of your life rather than focusing on the things you lack.

On the other hand, you could also make room for another journal- one that is completely dedicated to your negative and anxious thoughts. This is your form of release to any feelings of anxiety and worry that you may have. When you put all your anxious thoughts down on paper, it doesn’t seem as great as an impact compared to when you were just thinking it. Often times, when you write them down, it can calm your heart and help you to come to the realization that they’re all just irrational fears-they aren’t real.

9. Accept your flaws and mistakes

Generally, the realization that you’ve accepted even your flaws and imperfections is the key to loving yourself. The reason behind this is that you stop beating yourself up on your weaknesses and you focus on your strengths instead, It’s a normal human reaction to focus on what we don’t have rather than on what we have, however, this can affect how we perceive ourselves.

The more we beat ourselves up for what we lack, you’re putting yourself to a road of disappointment. No matter how much you beat yourself up, it’s gonna change facts. All you have now is the realization that maybe your strengths make up more than everything you lack in total. Maybe it had to happen to become the person you were meant to be today. Maybe your flaws and mistakes comprise more of who you are and what makes you distinct from the rest of the world. In realizing this, the closer you are in embracing who you truly are and thus, loving yourself.

Take a break from being so hard on yourself

10. Give yourself a break

Whether you have a tendency to pressure yourself with certain aspects of your life, you should be okay with giving yourself the break you deserve or else, it’s going to result to a burnout. You should give yourself necessary breaks when work gets too overwhelming and draining. The reason for this is, any person needs time to refuel and recharge in order to get that motivation they need to work again. This is essential in loving yourself because you can’t completely accept yourself if you’re too harsh to yourself all the time.

11. Change your life as you please

It’s okay to make necessary changes in your life if you’re not happy with the outcomes of your life anymore. You can’t love yourself if you’re not happy and proud of the life you’re living. Nobody deserves to settle for a life that they don’t want, and you shouldn’t either. It’s important to make necessary changes and know that it’s never too late to life the life you’ve always wanted. This will make you love yourself even more because this step requires taking accountability of your life and making a change in your life, which takes a lot of bravery and courage.

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